NOT SO MUCH
There have been too many years
Filled with too many tears, memories
Adrift in a dark sea of liquid dreams.
Yet,this was never about booze, or
The haze that blinded reality, or
Not having made an effort at anything,
Other than lifting that glass filled with
No tomorrows. This had been about
Being lost in a vatic reality, a lifetime
Attempting to escape the feelings of
Failure and inadequacy, a child not
Knowing who he was, or if there was
A tomorrow with love or comfort in it.
The growing into manhood, feeling
Lost and without direction or courage.
Understanding? No, only that
Unyielding bed of loneliness where
There was nothing left to feel or touch.
And hope? NOT SO MUCH